I thought that I had the secrets.
I thought that I could change lives.
I thought I had the magic.
I was right… about 50% of the time.
Let me explain.
I originally learned coaching technology from Tony Robbins, and Robbins teaches an ultra simplified version of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) and adds some important understandings of what he calls ‘Leverage in the process of change’ (a fancy way of saying that if you give someone a big enough ‘carrot’ and ‘stick’, that they’ll do just about anything that you want).
Put that stuff in a bag, shake it, bake it, and you’ve got 99% of Tony’s techniques.
This stuff is very helpful for getting people to make big, one-time decisions, and to help change how someone feels about pretty much anything. There’s no question that it’s powerful.
I was confident that it was all I needed to change the world, one client at a time. So I began my journey.
What I found was that people would get amazing results right off the bat with me, but invariably, after about 3-4 months, they would just quit, or stop showing up to sessions! One of the reasons this was happening was because their results were disappearing, and their life was going back to the old pattern. They were going back to old habits. The inertia was winning.
After doing this for about 2 years, I finally realized that as a business and as a service, this was unsustainable. I was burned out for the first time ever as a coach, and I was burned out because I was tired of ‘pushing a rock up a hill’ and I didn’t believe in what I was doing anymore.
I decided that I just couldn’t continue on that way, and I closed the doors to my business shortly after that.
I didn’t, however, close those doors because I was quitting the whole process of coaching; I did it because I needed time to revamp the service.
See… I knew what was missing.
I was lucky enough to have participated in just about every program that Landmark Education ever offered (except for the Communication Curriculum). I noticed something very different about the work they were doing there. They weren’t trying to help you make decisions or feel better about anything. They were just committed to doing anything they could to get you to ACT.
There were two ways they did this:
1. Intense and Rigorous Accountability: They just kicked your butt, basically. And they did it in a very logical way, but in a way that was very hard to argue with. In fact the whole sales strategy of top level salespeople and leadership at Landmark Education is to OUT AURGUE EVERYBODY. Their belief is that he who wins the argument will take the lead.
2. Peer Pressure: Landmark has gotten a bit of a ‘cult’ reputation, and for good reason. They use group dynamics, or ‘group think’ to push people into action. They know that if they get enough people to tell you to do something over and over again, at some point… you’ll do it!! It’s really that simple.
I found myself doing some pretty crazy things as a result of being a part of Landmark Education’s offerings, and although not all of it helped me in my life, I got the lesson.
The important lesson to learn was how THEY got OTHER PEOPLE to do WHAT THEY WOULDN’T NORMALLY DO… over and over again… LIKE CLOCKWORK.
Here I was with all these ‘magic bullets’, and I couldn’t get people to stick with their plans for over 3 months, and Landmark had nothing but pseudo-science and applied eastern philosophy, and they created lifetime followers for their cause. Even worse, for at least a short time I WAS ONE OF THEM. I SACRIFICED MY OWN BUSINESS AND MY OWN WELL-BEING TO HELP THEM.
HMMMM… Something to think about!
I wanted to apply what they were so good at to my clients. I wanted my clients to get into action like Landmark’s loyal followers. What if I took all the group aspects of Landmarks programs and applied them in a virtual world? What if I took all those great accountability and leadership techniques and combined them with the ‘magic bullets’ that were initially so valuable for my clients?
For two months, I worked my butt off, and when JTS Advisors re-opened its doors, we had the NEW Team Coaching program.
The really significant change, was that after 3-6 months of the NEW Team Coaching, 90% of our clients were getting major and sustainable results out of the process! Not only that, but on average, our clients were doubling their income within that same time frame!!
WE WERE NOT GETTING THOSE KIND OF RESULTS BEFORE.
Although there were several important changes and strategies we used to get those kinds of results, two of the keys were…
Accountability and Leadership
Let’s explore these a bit…
What’s the benefit of accountability in the coaching relationship?
People become responsible.
What does that mean? It means that people are ABLE to RESPOND.
Accountability means that you enter into an agreement to something more than what's already existing in the world, and you’re willing to keep that agreement.
More simply put: YOU DO WHAT YOU SAY YOU WILL DO.
This gives us access to create whatever we really want in the world.
ACCOUNTABILITY = RESULTS
NO ACCOUNTABILITY = NO RESULTS
Many times, people know what to do, but they don't do what they know, and accountability gives people access to change that whole dynamic, to turn it around.
ACCOUNTABILITY = CONFIDENCE
NO ACCOUNTABILITY = NO CONFIDENCE
When you start following through on things that you wouldn’t normally do (or at least that you wouldn’t normally WANT to do), you start to believe that you are in charge, and as you know, that CONFIDENCE will help you along your journey.
What is LEADERSHIP?
Leadership is getting OTHERS to WILLINGLY do what they WOULDN’T NORMALLY DO if left to their own devices.
This is what it takes to create accountability in your clients. Leadership is the missing piece in most coaches that aren’t yet effective.
You can think of leadership as being the coach’s job, and accountability being the client’s job. Ultimately, as the coach, you are responsible for managing the whole process and YOUR LEADERSHIP will generate THEIR ACCOUNTABILITY.
It doesn't matter how magical you are. If you don’t provide leadership, that inspiration isn't going to extend past the phone call because they'll be inspired, but when they hang up the phone, then they will get the same result they were getting before!
That doesn't offer a lot of value.
THEY'LL ALSO WONDER WHY THEY ARE PAYING YOU.
They’ll think, 'Why am I spending all this money?'
You'll think, 'I've got a client and they really like me!’
…and two months later THEY QUIT...
Why???.
Because they actually looked at their pocketbook and they looked at the results and they saw that they were lighter in the pocket book and they have the same life, and they'll think... 'This is a great person, but I’ve got great friends already!'
They needed results, and you didn’t deliver.
So even if you have to get in your clients face and be a bit intense,
even if you have to say some things that aren’t quite ‘magical’…
DO IT!
Your client will thank you for it.
In the JTS Advisors Coach Training, we cover a ton about how to provide this ‘in your face’ accountability and leadership. We provide over 21 pages of word-for-word dialogues of accountability and leadership conversations. You’ll actually listen to audio examples of these dialogues as they were used in live coaching sessions with master accountability coaches. You’ll LITERALLY be scored on your accountability and leadership in every coaching session you perform!
For a full audio covering ALL the ‘Secrets of Coaching’ go to:
http://www.getcoachcertified.com/secrets.html
For more about the JTS Advisors Coaches Training, go to:
http://www.getcoachcertified.com/
Or call me @ 619-286-1797!
Jeffrey T. Sooey
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